You know you're really a mom whenŠ 1. You count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake to make sure they're equal. 2. You have time to shave only one leg at a time. 3. You hide in the bathroom to be alone. 4. You mastered the art of placing food on a plate without anything touching. 5. Your child insists that you read "Once Upon a Potty" out loud in the lobby of the doctor's office, and you do it. 6. You hire a sitter because you haven't been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the night talking about and checking on the kids. 7. You hope ketchup is a vegetable because it's the only one your child eats. 8. You find yourself cutting your husband's sandwiches into unusual shapes. 9. You hear your mother's voice coming out of your mouth when you say, "Not in your good clothes." 10. You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you. 11. You read that the average five-year-old asks 437 questions a day and feel proud that your kid is "above average." 12. You say at least once a day, "I'm not cut out for this job," but you know you wouldn't trade it for anything.