Glen's Quotes Db (3184 total)

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got
canned...couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so
they gave me the ax.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was exhausting.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my
net income.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the
work was just too draining.
So then I got a job in a gymnasium, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in
it.
SO I RETIRED, AND I FOUND I AM A PERFECT FIT FOR THE JOB!

The mouse is an animal, which, killed in sufficient numbers under carefully
controlled conditions, will produce a PhD thesis.

Failure can be divided into those who thought and never did and into those who did and never thought. –

I am learning slowly to bring my crazy pinball-machine mind back to this place of friendly detachment toward myself, so I can look out at the world and see all those other things with respect. Try looking at your mind as a wayward puppy that you are trying to paper train. You don’t drop-kick a puppy into the neighbor’s yard every time it piddles on the floor. You just keep bringing it back to the newspaper. So I keep trying gently to bring my mind back to what is really there to be seen, maybe to be seen and noted with a kind of reverence.