37 Kinder, Gentler Ways to Say Someone is Stupid 1. A few clowns short of a circus 2. A few fries short of a Happy Meal 3. An experiment in artificial stupidity 4. A few cans short of a six-pack 5. Dumber than a box of hair 6. A few peas short of a casserole 7. Doesn't have all his Cornflakes in one box 8. The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead 9. One Froot Loop shy of a full bowl 10. One taco short of a combo plate 11. A few feathers short of a whole duck 12. All fizz, no pop 13. The cheese slid off the cracker 14. Body by Fisher - Brains by Mattel 15. Has an IQ of 2 and it takes 3 to grunt 16. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear 17. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel 18. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down 19. An intellect rivalled only by garden tools 20. As smart as bait 21. Chimney's clogged 22. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash 23. Doesn't know much but leads the league in nostril hair 24. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor 25. Forgot to pay his brain bill 26. Her sewing machine's out of thread 27. His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels 28. His belt doesn't go through all the loops 29. If he had another brain it would be lonely 30. Missing a few buttons on his remote control 31. No grain in the silo 32. Receiver is off the hook 33. Several nuts short of a full pouch 34. Skylight leaks a little 35. Slinky's kinked 36. Too much yardage between the goal posts 37. Surfing in Nebraska