The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to to believe that experience is a substitute for intelligence.

Intelligence appears to be the thing that enables a man to get along without an education. Education appears to be the thing that enables a man to get along without the use of his intelligence.

One could not be a successful scientist without realizing that, in contrast to the popular conception supported by newspapers and mothers of scientists, a goodly number of scientists are not only narrow-minded and dull, but also just stupid.

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

Everything has been thought of before, but the problem is to think of it again.

Lack of will power has caused more failure than lack of intelligence or ability.

"Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully. "Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever." "And he has a Brain." "Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has a Brain." There was a long silence. "I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."

Ordinary chickens have at least 25 different calls and they use them in some language-like ways. Not only do they communicate directly with each other, but they consider what they are about to say and can even tell lies. When a rooster finds some food, he sometimes makes a "took took took" sound. The "took took" call is repeated much more when there is a hen nearby. Hearing the call, the hen usually strolls over to the male, who may offer her choice morsels from his own beak. Hens who hear "took took" also peer down at the ground, as if looking for food. But sometimes a rooster will say "took took" when there's no food just to get the female to come over. It appears that at least some chicken calls are more than just reflex reactions, since they change depending on whether others are listening and are sometimes used for deception. Read about the intelligence of chickens: http://soma.npa.uiuc.edu/~mmaciver/chicken_smart.html Lizards also communicate in complex ways: http://features.LearningKingdom.com/fact/archive/1999/08/23.html

My forgetter's getting better But my rememberer is broke. To you that may seem funny but, to me, that is no joke. For when I'm "here" I'm wondering If I really should be "there." And, when I try to think it through, I haven't got a prayer! Oft times I walk into a room, Say "what am I here for?" I wrack my brain, but all in vain; A zero, is my score. At times I put something away Where it is safe, but, Gee! The person it is safest from Is, generally, me! When shopping I may see someone, Say "Hi" and have a chat, Then, when the person walks away I ask myself "who's that?" Yes, my forgetter's getting better While my rememberer is broke, And it's driving me plumb crazy And that isn't any joke.

37 Kinder, Gentler Ways to Say Someone is Stupid 1. A few clowns short of a circus 2. A few fries short of a Happy Meal 3. An experiment in artificial stupidity 4. A few cans short of a six-pack 5. Dumber than a box of hair 6. A few peas short of a casserole 7. Doesn't have all his Cornflakes in one box 8. The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead 9. One Froot Loop shy of a full bowl 10. One taco short of a combo plate 11. A few feathers short of a whole duck 12. All fizz, no pop 13. The cheese slid off the cracker 14. Body by Fisher - Brains by Mattel 15. Has an IQ of 2 and it takes 3 to grunt 16. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear 17. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel 18. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down 19. An intellect rivalled only by garden tools 20. As smart as bait 21. Chimney's clogged 22. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash 23. Doesn't know much but leads the league in nostril hair 24. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor 25. Forgot to pay his brain bill 26. Her sewing machine's out of thread 27. His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels 28. His belt doesn't go through all the loops 29. If he had another brain it would be lonely 30. Missing a few buttons on his remote control 31. No grain in the silo 32. Receiver is off the hook 33. Several nuts short of a full pouch 34. Skylight leaks a little 35. Slinky's kinked 36. Too much yardage between the goal posts 37. Surfing in Nebraska

Michael Jordan will make over $300 000 a game : $10 000 a minute, assuming he averages about 30 minutes per game. Assuming $40 million in endorsements this year, he’ll be making $178100 a day (working or not)! Assuming he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52 000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. If he goes to see a movie, it’ll cost him $7 , but he’ll make $18 550 while he’s there. If he decides to have a 5 minute egg, he’ll make $618 while boiling it. He makes $7 415 per hour more than the minimum wage (after the wage hike). He’ll make $3 710 while watching each episode of Friends. If he wanted to save up for a new Acura NSX ($90 000) it would take him a whole 12 hours. If someone were to hand him his salary and endorsement money, they would have to do it at the rate of $2 every second. He’d probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33 390 for that round. Assuming he puts the federal maximum of 15% of his income into his tax deferred account, he will hit the federal cap of $9 500 for such accounts at 8:30 a.m. on January 1st, 1998. If you were given a tenth of a penny for every dollar he made, you’d be living comfortably at $65 000 a year. He’ll make about $19.60 while watching the hundred meter dash in the Olympics. He’ll make about $15600 while the Boston Marathon is being run. While the common person is spending about $20 for a meal in his trendy Chicago restaurant, he’ll pull in about $5600. Next year he’ll make more than twice as much as all of our past presidents for all their terms combined. Amazing, isn’t it? BUT: Jordan will have to save 100% of his income for 270 years to have a net worth equivalent to that of Bill Gates today !

Smart Is Not The Same As Useful

Giving a person a high IQ is kind of like giving a person a million dollars. A few individuals will do something interesting with it, but most will piss it away on trinkets and pointless exercises.