A good memory is needed after one has lied.

Don't let your mouth write no check that your tail can't cash.

The man who is brutally honest enjoys the brutality quite as much as the honesty. Possibly more.

In 1978 two women began their own business-Wetherill Associates, Inc-in an industry you wouldn't typically associate with women entrepreneurs: automobile parts. Wetherill rebuilds and distributes replacement car parts. The founders (Marie Bothe and Edith Gripton) had the idea to to develop a business based on ethical practices; they wanted their company to be a living example of the maxim: "Right actions lead to right results. Wrong action leads to wrong results." As part of their training, employees were taught to apply ethical standards to all matters of their job performance. For example, sales people were told never to pressure customers, never to discredit competitors, never to use negative sales tactics, and-most of all-under no conditions were they to lie. So, what are the chances a company led by two idealistic women can survive in the dog-eat-dog world of used car parts? Most people who were asked that question in 1978 laughed condescendingly. But they're not laughing anymore. Twenty two years later, Wetherill Associates is still going strong. Sales are in the hundreds of millions; profits are in the tens of millions, and the company is debt-free.

"It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place."

An 80-year-old couple was worried because they kept forgetting things all the time. The doctor assured them there was nothing seriously wrong except old age, and suggested they carry a notebook and write things down so they wouldn't forget. Several days later the old man got up to go to the kitchen. His wife said, "Dear, get me a bowl of ice cream while you're up." "Okay," he said. "...and put some chocolate syrup on it and a few cherries on it, too," she added. "You'd better write all this down." "I won't forget!" he said. Twenty minutes later he came back into the room and handed her a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. She glared at him. "Now, I told you to write it down! I knew you'd forget." "What did I forget?" he asked. She replied, "My toast!"

A bus of politicians is driving by a farm where a man lives alone. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch. The man comes out and finding the politicians, buries them. The next day, the police are at the farm questioning the man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the police officer. "Were they all dead?" The man answered, "Some said they weren't, but you know how politicians lie."

A 4-year-old boy who was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.

There was a middle aged guy who bought a Mercedes convertible 2000. He took off down the road, floored it up to 80 mph and enjoyed the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head. "This is great," he thought and floored it some more. He looked in his rearview mirror and there was a Florida Highway Patrol Trooper behind him with his blue lights flashing and siren blasting. "I can get away from him with no problem," thought the man and flew down the road at over 100 mph. Then he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing" and pulled over to the side of the road to wait for the State Trooper to catch up with him. The Trooper pulled in behind the Mercedes and walked up to the man. "Sir," he said, looking at his watch. "My shift ends in 30 minutes and today is Friday." "If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go". The man looked back at the Trooper and said, "Last week my wife ran off with a State Trooper and I thought you were bringing her back!! The State Trooper said, "Have a nice day!"

A big city lawyer was called in on a case between a farmer and a large railroad company. The farmer noticed that his prize cow was missing from the field through which the railroad passed. He filed suit against the railroad company for the value of the cow. The case was to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. The attorney immediately cornered the farmer and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, keeping the conversation moving and not letting the farmer get much of a word in. The farmer finally agreed to take half of what he was claiming to settle the case. After the farmer signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn't help but gloat a little over his success. He said to the farmer, "You know, I hate to tell you this, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn't have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your farm that morning. I didn't have one witness to put on the stand." The old farmer replied, "Well, I'll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself. That durned cow came home this morning!"

A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in Vegas. She's down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?" A man standing next to her suggests, "I don't know...why don't you play your age?" He walks away. Moments later, his attention is grabbed by a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe she won! He rushes back to the table and pushes his way through the crowd. The lady is lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her. The man is stunned. He asks, "What happened? Is she all right?" The operator replies, "I don't know. She put all her money on 29, and 36 came up. Then she just fainted!"

In some churches there is “an unwritten and unspoken rule that said, ‘It is better to be nice than honest’.” “If you speak about the problem out loud, you are the problem.” “The truth is, when people talk about problems out loud, they don't cause them, they simply expose them.”

S. I. McMillen, in his book None of These Diseases, tells a story of a young woman who wanted to go to college, but her heart sank when she read the question on the application blank that asked, "Are you a leader?" Being both honest and conscientious, she wrote, "No," and returned the application, expecting the worst. To her surprise, she received this letter from the college: "Dear Applicant: A study of the application forms reveals that this year our college will have 1,452 new leaders. We are accepting you because we feel it is imperative that they have at least one follower." Citation: J. R. Love, Ruston, Louisiana

A lie has speed but truth has endurance. By: Edgar Mohn Source: quoted in 'Ethics: Easier Said Than Done', 1993, Issue 22, pg 8

Be straightforward and honest about your true feelings. Rather be too rude than too smooth, too blunt than too kind. Rather say an unkind word that is true than one that is “nice” but ungenuine. You can always be sorry for an unkind word, but hypocrisy causes permanent harm.

People in a temper often say a lot of silly, terrible things they mean.

A lawyer dies and goes to Heaven. "There must be some mistake," the lawyer argues. "I’m too young to die. I’m only fifty five." "Fifty five?" says Saint Peter. "No, according to out calculations, you’re eighty two." "How’s you get that?" the lawyer asks. Answers St. Peter: "We added up your time sheets."

I should either have been less specific or more correct…

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"The revelation was one thing, the repetition quite another."

A survey tells you what people think they ought to say when a stranger knocks on the door and begins asking suspicious questions.

Embrace Reality

How many legs does a dog have, if you call a tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.

The Plain Truth

My father said whoever tells the longest story is always the liar. The truth isn't that complicated.

Accentuate The Positive

Seventy-six percent of [six year olds] take the chance to peek during the game, and when asked if they peeked, 95 percent lie about it. But sometimes the researcher will read the child a short storybook before she asks about the peeking. One story read aloud is The Boy Who Cried Wolf—the version in which both the boy and the sheep get eaten because of his repeated lies. Alternatively, they read George Washington and the Cherry Tree, in which young George confesses to his father that he chopped down the prized tree with his new hatchet. The story ends with his father’s reply: “George, I’m glad that you cut down the tree after all. Hearing you tell the truth instead of a lie is better than if I had a thousand cherry trees.” Now, which story do you think reduced lying more? When we surveyed 1,300 people, 75 percent thought The Boy Who Cried Wolf would work better. However, this famous fable actually did not cut down lying at all in Talwar’s experiments. In fact, after hearing the story, kids lied even a little more than normal. Meanwhile, hearing George Washington and the Cherry Tree—even when Washington was replaced with a nondescript character, eliminating the potential that his iconic celebrity might influence older kids—reduced lying a sizable 43 percent in kids. Although most kids lied in the control situation, the majority hearing George Washington told the truth.