"No God -- No Peace. Know God -- Know Peace." "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!" "Try our Sundays. They're better than Baskin-Robbins." "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!" An ad for a church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets." "Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons -- come hear one!" "People are like tea bags -- you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are." "God so loved the world that He did NOT send a committee." "Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!" "When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right." "Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday." "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world." ""If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns." "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" ---------> (U R)

source: Church Signs reported on the Internet tags: Church, Humor, Advertising