Suppose a young man goes off to the military and he sends his girlfriend a postcard every few weeks with one or two lines jotted on there: "thinking of you, dear!" "wish you were here" "can't wait until I see you again." contrast that with a young man who goes off to the military and every week sends his girlfriend a detailed letter describing his life and his feelings, and expressing undying devotion and love to her. Which one is demonstrating greater love? Suppose a young man invites a young girl on a very creative date filled with fun and surprises at every turn. Contrast that with the one who picks her up, takes her to see a movie he decides on at the last minute and then takes her to whatever restaurant is open. In both cases, planning beats out impulsiveness for genuine romance. Impulsiveness must be a part of true romance, there's no doubt about it. But so must planning. More to the point, there is a degree of authenticity in the one who subjects his emotions to his will that there is not in the one who lets his emotions dictate his will.