“Doctor, Doctor my son has swallowed my pen, what should I do?” ”Use a pencil ‘till I get there” “Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I do this.” “OK, don’t do that anymore!” “Doctor, Doctor I've broke my arm in two places “ ”Well don't go back to those places!” “Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee” ”Have you tried taking the spoon out of you mug?” “Doctor, doctor, I touch my head and it hurts. I touch my chest and it hurts. I touch my leg and it hurts. Everywhere I touch it hurts—what’s wrong with me?” “You have a broken finger.”