These are quotes which stood out to me, possibly for use in a sermon someday. Their presence here does not mean I agree with them, it merely shows that I might want to reference them later. The default view is five random selections. Use the tag list on the right to view all quotes relevant to that theme.
Actor:"I'm a smash hit. Why, yesterday during the last act, I had everyone glued in their seats!" Oliver Herford: "Wonderful! Wonderful! Clever of you to think of it!"
id: 226 | source: Oliver Herford | tags: Authenticity, Humor
More medical humor THE NEW ABRIDGED MEDICAL DICTIONARY (Source: Edmonton Journal, Friday Aug 4, 1995) BARIUM: What doctors do when patients die. COLIC: A sheep dog. D&C: Where Bill Clinton lives. DILATE: To live longer. FESTER: Quicker. HANGNAIL: Coat hook. IMPOTENT: Distinguished, well known. LABOR PAIN: Get hurt at work. MEDICAL STAFF: A doctor's cane. MORBID: A higher offer. NITRATES: Cheaper than day rates. NODE: Was aware of. OUTPATIENT: A patient who fainted. PAP SMEAR: A fatherhood test. PELVIS: Cousin to Elvis. RECOVERY ROOM: A place to do upholstery. RECTUM: Dang near killed 'em. TERMINAL ILLNESS: Getting sick at the airport. TERMINAL ILLNESS: Getting sick at your computer. TUMOR: More than one. URINE: Opposite of "You're out".
It all began with Adam. He was the first man to tell a joke- or a lie. How lucky Adam was. He knew when he said a good thing, nobody had said it before. Adam was not alone in the Garden of Eden, however, and does not deserve all the credit; much is due to Eve, the first woman, and Satan, the first consultant.
id: 2073 | source: Mark Twain, Notebook, 1867 | tags: Experts, Originality
The most radical revolutionary will become a conservative the day after the revolution.
Stated simply, the number one reason for the decline in church attendance is that members attend with less frequency than they did just a few years ago. Allow me to explain. If the frequency of attendance changes, then attendance will respond accordingly. For example, if 200 members attend every week the average attendance is, obviously, 200. But if one-half of those members miss only one out of four weeks, the attendance drops to 175. Did you catch that? No members left the church. Everyone is still relatively active in the church. But attendance declined over 12 percent because half the members changed their attendance behavior slightly.
id: 3216 | source: The Number 1 Reason For The Decline In Church Attendance… (Thom Ranier, Facts & Trends), https://factsandtrends.net/2018/12/17/the-number-1-reason-for-the-decline-in-church-attendance/ | tags: Church, Statistics